Oh no, I'm going to miss my April deadline! Uh, look, here's a breakfast burrito!

Sauté red onion in butter and olive oil (yes! both!); add sliced jalapeño, halved cherry tomatoes, and bits of whatever leftover bell pepper you have lying around in your crisper. Season with cumin, ground chipotle, and salt. Throw in lots of chopped zucchini or other summer squash and cook until tender. Turn heat down to medium; add eggs; scramble. Pile the finished business into warm tortillas, cover with chopped cilantro, take steam-ridden pictures, and eat swiftly.